1moremakes6

Almost 2 years Old!

2011-11-30T23:05:00.000-05:00

I can't believe I haven't blogged in 2.5 months. Actually I can, because I thought of it often, just never did it.
In un-Alanna news, we are moving!! As in RIGHT now we are moving. We are PCSing to Langley AFB, VA. I am so excited. That has always been at the top of my list.
We are in between places right now. Trying to buy a house. Just LOTS going on.

Of course what you came here for Ms Alanna.
I cannot believe my baby will be 2 in a couple weeks! She has grown so much in the barely 8 months that we have had her. To think she didn't know how to smile, laugh, reach up to be held, cry for attention, etc...

Let's see, how about a Stimming Update first!
I realized it had gotten much better, but I didn't realize HOW, much better till my FIL said to me the other day "she doesn't hit herself in the head anymore does she?"
Well, she does, but I would say about mmm, maybe 10-15% as much as she used to. No joke! She did become obsessed with bouncing the back of her head off the couch cushions for several months, but that has eased up quite a bit.
I contribute this mostly to her knowing to come to me when she wants something so she is not as stressed as before. Also, she is just too busy! She went from having little interest in toys, unless we sat them right in front of her and played with her to her dragging out all her toys to play everyday, for lengthy periods of time.
My goodness, as a I typed that tears run down my face. She is no longer trapped inside her little neglected body, too emotionally neglected to know how to deal with things. She is so full of life now!
People who have down syndrome are know for not liking change and she def displayed this when we went on a little trip just her and I to Ohio to visit my sister and my new nephew. First she had a little stomach bug, but then she was just all over the place emotionally. Refusing to eat, screaming at even the sight of food, every meal except the one she slept through was spent with her screaming.
She does display some self harm behavior when she gets upset, which tears at me. She will scratch and pry at her mouth, she pulled her own hair, etc...
The minute we were back home, she was back to her old self. Like someone flipped a switch!

I know that trip was hard for her, most likely combined with the stomach bug she had. But we are always on the go, so I think the best thing is just to keep her as used to it as we can. We have been at my inlaws for a week now, and she is doing really well.

I'll post a few pics and update more the next couple days.

21 Months Old!

2011-09-13T22:54:00.000-04:00

My Lanna girl is 21 months old today. It makes me sad she is getting big too fast. The changes I see in her are amazing to me. Every single one makes me so emotional.
She is exploring her environment sooo much more. She crawls all over the house. We used to have to put her toys in front of her. Now she goes over and picks out the ones she wants and drags them over to play. She is starting to have a sense of humor. She has her favorite Baby Signing Times DVD and when I put it in she gets so excited.

She's getting a little sense of humor. She likes to hear me laugh, so she gives me this big cheesy smile. It cracks me up everytime. I looove it. She does it to other people to like her therapists. Little Ham.
She is pulling up on everything and cruising! She signs eat. She says Mama!! (not regularly but at times)
Her favorite place to be is in my lap. She pulls to be picked up then turns her little self around to sit down. We had friends over watching a movie and she sat in my lap the whole time.
When she got restless in church service this past Sunday I went and took her to the 2 year old (the 1 year old room was empty, I guess everyone turned 2) Normally this would just trigger a lot of stimming. The room was packed. She crawled right over to the toys and pulled some toys off the shelf to play with. I was so proud and happy for her!
This morning she crawled into the dining room, normally she goes in there to lick the chairs, haha. I could hear her, I didn't hear any stimming just babbling. A couple minutes later I went in there and this is what I found

My Smart Head Banger

2011-09-13T22:35:00.000-04:00

This chick is too smart. Her favorite stims have to do with her head, mostly hitting the side of her forehead. Sometimes very hard, mostly when she is tired or something is wrong. Her new stim. (overall her stimming has lessened) is bouncing her head off the couch. She sits with her back to the couch and bangs/bounces the back of her body off the couch cushions. If she is in front of the arm of the couch it is hard and she cries, then scoots over to where the cushions are, LOL. She tests banging her head on other surfaces, like walls, tables, floor, but she does it very slowwly and only once then she decides, nope that will hurt. Thank God!! I let her bounce her head off the couch because it's much better than any other surface!!

A Few Of Her Favorite Things

2011-09-06T22:22:00.000-04:00

It's somewhat challenging to find toys that are easy enough for Alanna to manipulte in a manner that will keep her attention. So I thought maybe you guys might want to see some of her favorites and maybe your kiddos would enjoy them as well.

I picked this up at a nice toy store, I think it was 12.99, they have it on Amazon for a couple bucks cheaper. I love amazon! You fill it up with water, there are little floating fish. She can hear and see the water splash as she hits it, she loves it.

http://www.amazon.com/Earlyears-Fill-Fun-Water-Mat/dp/B000E82WRM/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1314401898&sr=1-1

Another favorite is her Leapfrog activity table. I love any Leap Frog products, they are well made and engage the children well.

http://www.amazon.com/LeapFrog-Learn-Groove-Musical-Table/dp/B000ETRENI/ref=sr_1_1?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1314401983&sr=1-1

This ball popper toy, she loves!! What kid wouldn't. But we have to be right there to pick up the balls that pop out and to push the button to make it go, it is too hard for her. She knows to push buttons, but this one is too hard.
http://www.amazon.com/Hasbro-8490-Playskool-Busy-Tumble/dp/B000GB4EAA/ref=pd_sim_t_37

Apartly if you are that determined, you can buy this modified one.
For a hefty price of course.

http://www.amazon.com/Enabling-Devices-Adapted-Air-tivity-Popper/dp/B004XJ4MX0/ref=sr_1_68?s=toys-and-games&ie=UTF8&qid=1314402591&sr=1-68

We have a regular Fisher Price xylophone, but she doesn't hold onto the stick to wack it. This one she I linked to she loves!! The keys are very easy to make go down, and it's fairly loud.

http://www.amazon.com/Little-Tikes-Baby-Tune-Piano/dp/B001QXDIVS/ref=sr_1_17?s=toys-and-games&ie=UTF8&qid=1314402350&sr=1-17

I'm not sure what this toy is called. But it's for young babies to lay under and hit and play with the toys. She loves going In things, so she goes under it and places, or rocks back and forth.

She loves this Baby Einstein Ball.

http://www.amazon.com/Baby-Einstein-30974-Bendy-Ball/dp/B001UF8BL4/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1315360267&sr=8-1

And this ball popper, it is easy enough for her to push down. She has another one just like it that she can't do.
http://www.amazon.com/Hasbro-8490-Playskool-Busy-Tumble/dp/B000GB4EAA/ref=sr_1_12?ie=UTF8&qid=1315360356&sr=8-12

Her number one favorite toy is her Johnny Jump Up, I picked it up at a consignment store for 12.00, the BEST 12.00 ever spent.
It is great for her sensory needs. The things she does in there are amazing! She sticks one foot to the floor then uses the other to go around and around, then lifts her legs to spin around. etc...
She is outgrowing it. I have been looking at indoor swings, does anyone have one they love?
I highly recommend the Johnny Jump Up with the tray, it provides a little buffer between them and the doorway.
Like this one

http://www.amazon.com/Graco-Bumper-Jumper-Little-Jungle/dp/B000WJLKQM/ref=pd_sbs_ba_1

What are your kids' favorite toys?

Eye Appointment

2011-08-22T22:28:00.000-04:00

Alanna's eyes cross. They both cross in, but not necessarily at the same time or to the same degree, and not all the time. The doctor looked at her eyes, he agreed "yes, I do think they are crossing" mmmk.
So they gave her the drops to dialate her eyes, we waited 20 minutes then he took a lense and a light to look and check for refraction to see if she is farsighted. None of which she appreciated.
He explained all kids are far sighted, but kids with with disabilities such as Down Syndrome are more prone to it. He said the plan would be for her to wear glasses all the time. Until sometime when she is 5,6,7, 8, or so she will outgrow the farsightedness. Her eyes are crossing in an effort to see, so supposedly the crossing will stop with the glasses because she will be able to see.
He said he wanted to see her back in 1 month. Of course there is an eye shop attached to his office, so he gave us a coupon and sent us on our way. They tried 2 pairs of glasses on her, both metal frames, which seemed very unrealistic to me, the glasses will be over 200.00 and I can see her reaching up and breaking those in about 10 seconds flat. So I am researching our options.
As I was about to leave the room, the docotor says he wants to ask me something personal. "Why in the world would you want to adopt a 4th child when he already have 3" (he had asked earlier if she was my only child) My big response was "because we wanted to, and we could, so we did"
I did not get the vibe this is what he wanted to ask me, I think what he was getting at was why did you adopt a child with special needs when you have children already. He went on to say he just didn't understand, etc... Why would anyone want so many children? He said he had 3 and that my kids must just be better behaved than his because it was hard. To which I said "must be, my kids are pretty amazing"

www.solobambini.com
www.miraflexglasses.com
www.tomatoeye.com
www.specs4us.com

Other useful sites

http://leahlefler.hubpages.com/hub/Kids-Glasses-Choosing-Eyeglasses-for-Childrens

http://littlefoureyes.com/photo-gallery/

18 month Check Up

2011-08-13T09:24:00.000-04:00

Alanna had her 18 month check up several days ago. Yes, she is almost 20 months. My intention was to make her 18 month appt when we moved so it could be her first appt with her new Dr but of course we never moved.
Alanna is amazingly healthy. Her heart diagnosis that we recieved overseas was an extra chord (no big deal, like an extra finger). And a small hole that has closed up, no murmur can be heard. But I really wanted her checked out just to give her the all clear on her heart, so she has an appt for an ECHO next Friday.
I find it interesting that both times I've taken her to the dr. for her routine check ups they hand me the same sheet they hand me when I take my other children. This just seems odd to me. I'm not overly sensitive, trust me, but couldn't there be an alternative with real information on children who have Down Syndrome? Does everyone's elses doctors do it the same way?
Also, I had read about the Down Syndrome Growth Chart. Our children with designer genes tend to be smaller, so there is a custom growth chart. The doctor didn't refer to that, he used the typical growth chart. Again, it does not offend me, but as a mother wouldn't I want to know how my child is doing in comparison to children like her. Again, I'm not seperating her. But how would you feel if you took your child to the doctor and they used a growth chart for children with Down Syndrome. Would that tell you anything about their development?
My Lanna girl is 90th percentile on height
50th percentile on weight
and 75th for head cirmcumference
That is on the Down Syndrome Scale, I forget what the dr said about the typical scale.
The Down Syndrome Scale can be found here www.growthcharts.com

I'm going to do another post on our ENT visit and see what you guys have to say about that, I love others input.

She goes to PT once a week, both myself and the PTs agreed this was adequate, she is very strong for a child with Down Syndrome and I work with her at home as well. She will be starting OT with an a lady out of her home soon. There is very limited resources in our area for pediatric PT and OT, it is shocking really. My girls see some great PTs but it was like pulling teeth to get them access at first. I only found out about the OT through someone else who goes to her.

Alanna does not handle the immunizations well. (please don't start an immunization debate on my blog, there are other places for that) I only allow them to give her several at a time and she still runs a low grade fever after and sleeps the next day away. We woke her up from her nap after she'd been sleeping for 5.5 hours!!

Photo Shoot

2011-08-04T15:18:00.000-04:00

Reeces Rainbow wanted a recent picture of my pumpkin pie (my son Cooper says I need to stop calling her that because she is going to think I'm going to eat her!
So, I put her in a cute outfit I had bought before we even brought her home and tried to take some pictures. She was not feeling well, and was not cooperating. Really, a 19 month old not ready and willing to perfectly pose for the camera??!! But I love capturing even her cranky moods.
Here are a couple of my favorites:

A Video!

2011-07-25T20:55:00.001-04:00

My Lanna Girl, is starting to big girl crawl!! I think the technical term is 4 point crawl, but since she doesn't like to put that knee down, I think right now it's more of a 3 point crawl!

I'm Baaaaaack!

2011-07-22T10:03:00.000-04:00

Sorry I've been gone so long. The week I was having last month when we found out that we were not moving, got worse when I found out that hubby would not be able to take leave (for a really stupid reason) for our trip to OH. Even though we weren't moving there we still had a trip planned to go visit friends and family. So I did what any crazy mother of 4 children would do, and decided to go anyways, without hubby.
People repeatedly either asked me if I was crazy or told me I as brave, which I think concludes that I am little of both, OK maybe there's a little more crazy in there than brave.
But truly I would have never done it by myself if Alanna wasn't the easiest baby ever. She is just so easy going, loving, and quite predicable. Always sleeping through the night, always eating just about everything and anything, she is so easy in public, just taking in the scenery!
We went to a large amusement park for the day. It was us Mommas with all the little ones, while the only Dad went with the big ones. We were there from 10:30-10:00 And she was so into what was going on she didn't sleep at all ALL day! Around 9, she fell asleep for about 30 minutes, then woke up and continued her day! With any of my other kids, I would have found a somewhat peacful spot to get them to sleep. But she was so happy there was really no need to do that.
My favorite thing right now is that she smiles and laughs so much more, and we don't always have to do something like tickle her to get her to do it. She becomes more interactive each day, but she can also play peacefully on the floor by herself.
She still loves doing hand motions with songs, and her massage. When I say "fingers" she puts both her hands out!
She is just the sweetest little thing.
Stimming Update:
The stimming is still there. The variety of stimming has lessened, which I am hopeful is a good sign. However her one stim of choice right now, is hitting her self, Hard, with her open palm on the side or her head. She does it so hard she makes herself cry. I don't like it!! Pulling her hand down does not work. However me laying my hand on her head so she is hitting my hand rather her head seems to be working to lessen it. But of course I have to be right there to do that.

Leaps and Bounds

2011-06-29T08:24:00.000-04:00

Alanna is doing great! And that is not just a sugar coated update. Her stimming has gotten so much better. Especially in overwhelming environments, I've noticed her looking around and taking things in rather then just hitting herself in the head. What I really love is she will look at something for a minute, then look at me, like "are you seeing what I'm seeing? Is this all OK?"
She is very attached to me. She seeks out my attention first and foremost. She will crawl up to me and pull on me to pick her up. And she will yell and at me if I walk through the room and don't stop to pick her up. I was sick with a stomach bug one day last week, so my husband took care of her all day. The next morning when I finally emerged from my bed, when she saw me she started whimpering and crawling toward me as fast as she could.
She will still stick her hands out to anyone for them to hold her. But I'm her number one choice! Momma loves that!

And, last weekend she pulled up!! And she has been doing it ever since. I was sitting having my coffee and reading blogs. One minute she was playing on the floor the next she was standing holding onto the couch next to me. I screamed "Oh My Gosh, Gary GET THE CAMERA!!" But make sure my face is not in the picture since I just woke up, ha!
She loves to play peek a boo, and anything that even remotely resembles a blanket she tries to put on her head to play. She loves to take her bib off too, so in these pictures she had pulled her bib off and tried to play peek boo. She forgot it was there and started eating again.

She is growing so fast. I don't think she has gained any weight because she is always on the go. But she has certainly grown in length because she has grown out of most of her 12 month clothes and sleepers.

Grrr, for real?!

2011-06-25T22:32:00.000-04:00

Not all of you know me in real life. So you may not know that we are military, well my hubby is so that means we are. And we were due to PCS (move) this summer. We had orders (official paperwork) with a report no later than date (the day he has to report there) of August 1st. Our movers were scheduled for July 14th the kids and I were leaving here June 30th to go to some family events. Because see were had orders to Wright AFB in Dayton, OH, 4 hours from my family, 1 hour from my best friends family.
My husband's boss recieves the news Friday afternoon, the position has been deleted, the job no longer exists, our orders are canceled. Military family nightmare come to life! What the 29744780q8423 oh oops let me try again $&%&^*. Whatever LOTS of bad words!!

NOOOOO. We had a lease signed with half an acre 3400 sq feet. My sister is due with her first baby in October. Officers normally move every 3-4 years. Robins AFB is our bermuda triangle, does anyone know we are still here, does anyone know where here is? We have been here 4.5 years. That's 2 extensions worth, my children are growing roots here, it scares me.

And we rent the home we live in now, we will find out Monday if we have to move out of it, because since we were moving, they found new tenants.

We don't know when we will get new orders, they say not till spring. Not sure if that's for sure or not. Couldn't find a whole lot out because we go the news on a Friday afternoon.

I am soooo thankful we hadn't bought a house where we are going, can you imagine? Yes, I know this could be way worse, as we reminded our children when we broke the news to them. My hubby has a job, etc... But man, does this stink.......

Disclaimer: yes, I know God has plan, yes I trust that. I am always up for an adventure. My human issue is I am not patient and I hate not knowing what is happening next. I make the ideal military wife, at 3 years I want to know where we are going and when, I'm ready!

NOT that kind of Swinging!

2011-06-11T21:26:00.000-04:00

Oh, my. So, I was looking at my stats this afternoon on blogger. It will tell you all kinds of things about your blog, like now people get to it. Such as links from other peoples blogs, facebook, and what words people have googled that lead them to your blog.
So when I read that 3 people had come to my blog by googling, "swinging for the first time"
My mind said "why would someone google that?" How many people google about someone swinging for the first time. Then it hit me, sorry I can be a little slow.
NOT that kind of swinging.
If you typed that as a google search and ended up here, maybe God is trying to tell you exactly how far off the target you are.

My Disclaimer

2011-06-10T08:57:00.000-04:00

A lot of times when an adoptive parent writes a post like I did yesterday they will get a nasty comment on their blog, something to the effect of, maybe you should not have adopted if you can't handle it, etc....
Then the person has to post a disclaimer, something to the effect of, I love this child, they are mine, I do not regret adopting them, etc..... Basically defend themselves. Why do have to do that? If a new birthmom is crying becuase she's having a hard time breastfeeding her newborn, or if a birhmom posts about their son with ADHD and how frustrating her day was, do we say to her, maybe you should not have had that child, NO!
I love my Lanna girl to the moon and back, there's your disclaimer.

Another thing I love is my online adoptive Mommy friends. What a huge resource of support of knowledge. As soon as one Mom found out I was upset about the stimming she offered to call me right away and lend her knowledge. It is like therapy talking to another Momma who can understand, truly I felt renewed.
So many different opinions came pouring in. I love different opinions!
Just a FEW of the things that helped me have a new percpective yesterday:
Alanna seeks out my love and attention, this is not typical of a child with autism
Brooke sharing that her adult brother with DS has always stimmed. Now he has a toothbrush that he lightly taps against his hand.
Another DS Momma sharing that her daughter stimms.
Those are just a few, everyone's comments, prayers, etc.... were so helpful. I have been holding in my worried for several weeks, I should not have done that, it was eating me up.
I had several Mommas thank me for posting it, saying they had either dealt with it or are dealing with it and were afraid to post about it.
That should not be the way we feel. The number one audience reading these blogs are other adoptive parents or hopeful adoptive parents. Why can't we be honest about our struggles. Doesn't it help us and others?
Alanna did not feel well yesterday, I'm sure that is why she was stimming soooo much, and it was just the straw that broke the Momma's back, you know how that is if your a Momma. This morning she is back to being herself, With lots of interaction and lots of stimming!! As long as we have the interaction I am a Momma with a happy heart.

Stimming makes me cry

2011-06-09T08:22:00.000-04:00

Feeding Alanna breakfast ended with me in tears. No matter what I did, how many times I called her name, tickled her, squeezed her hand, played airplane with the spoon, etc.... she would not make eye contact and she would not stop stimming. Hitting herself in the head, growling, hitting herself under the chin, flapping her hands, staring out of the corner of her eyes at her hand.
Let me rewind to Gotcha Day. When they handed her to me, she would not look at me, she simply diverted her eyes up, to the side, etc... anywhere except to me. She hit herself in the head and growled. "She's acting like she's autistic" I thought in my head. It scared me, I'm not going to lye. And as Serge asked me if we wanted to adopt her, I said yes, with a huge smile, when in my mind I was thinking, "I don't know, is she in there?" Maybe that behavior is normal for a 16 month old with Down Syndrome.
Whew, this is hard to type about the child I love so dearly, the child I can barely stand to be away from for several hours, the child who rarely ever sits in a stroller because I love to carry her around in my arms, close to me.
That night I layed in bed, exhausted from the crazy ride to our region and our 10 minute meeting with our new daughter. I remember thinking, I can't do this, we will just tell Serge we can't do this, we will just go home, she is so young and cute, she will get adopted by another family for sure, a family more equipped to deal with autism. Why did God even lead us to adopt such a young child, we wanted to adopt a 3-4 year old. We could have saved a child from being sent to the institution. I prayed and fell asleep.
The next morning I felt better, and of course after another visit with her I was in love, she made eye contact, played with toys, etc... She was still stimming and growling, but she was certainly in there. And those behaviors aren't unusual for a child who has spent their lives in an orphanage with no stimulation.
The stimming seemed to get better for awhile not as much hitting herself in the head, when we met her she had rough spots on her head from hitting herself so much. But she has added more stimming behaviors that we didn't see before.
She hits herself under her chin with the tips of her fingers
She flaps her fingers
She smacks herself hard in the face, I hear this when she wakes up in the morning and when she is trying to go to sleep at night
She rocks violently back and forth in her exersaucer
She never used to stim violently when I layed her down to bed. Now she does, and she sits up and rocks and hits her head on the crib, and she gets up on all fours and rocks really hard back and forth. I liked it much more when she layed there and sucked her thumb till she fell asleep. I just recently discovered she was stimming to go to sleep. From now on I will be holding her till she goes to sleep then laying her down.
It took a long time for her to respond to her name, but not only her name and sound being made would not make her turn. Yes, we do have a hearing test scheduled.
Now she does turn once in a while when we say her name. Sometimes not at all and sometimes only after we say it a couple times.
She is smart. She will not clap on her own, but she will pick up my hands and put them together so I will clap. She plays Peek-a-Boo, but she has no reaction to it, but I assume she likes it, because she puts things like birp clothes or shirts over her head to play. She never laughs in response to something, only to things physical like tickling.
I'm describing all this so I can input from other parents.

When we take her places, of course the stimming gets worse, because there's so much more going sensory input. I've noticed it makes people uncomfortable. They stare. Sometimes they ask why she is hitting herself, or growling. They will say hi but she diverts her eyes, and pull back her hand when they touch her. So they never ask to hold her. People have said things to her like "why are staring at your hand" "what are you staring at" "she must see something we don't", etc....

Yesterday was a good day, we had Drs appts to go to and she did not stim nearly as much as she usually does when we are out. But she is making up for it this morning. After feeding her breakfast I put her on the floor in the living room and I went into the kitchen to cry and to make my coffee. When I looked in on her she was rocking back and forth hitting herself over, and over, and over. I called her name, but of course she was in her own little world.
When I sat down on the couch with my coffee she crawled over and put her hands up to be picked up.
We work with her face to face for hours everyday. Playing, singing songs, doing hand motions. I have some deep massage I've been doing, which she normally does not stim through, this morning she did though.
I don't know if she's autistic. But it scares me so much, why, because I don't want her to be stuck inside herself. Noone wants their child to not respond to them.

First Time Swinging

2011-05-31T23:07:00.000-04:00

While we were in Huntsville visiting hubby's family this past weekend we took the kids to the park, it was Alanna's first time. I was hesitant to try her in the swing, because she doesn't like things like being lifted up over our head, she freaks out. She freaked out the first time, then it was pure joy.

Yep, our 7 year old fits into the baby swing still, and he thinks it's funny.

Our handsome Cody

Anastasia flying high

I swear swear this baby is the most beautiful thing ever!

How do you choose a child?

2011-05-27T08:26:00.000-04:00

I see people ask this question on the RR forum. My only answer is God tells you. Sometimes it's progressive, sometimes it's sudden. When we lost Ella, we did not know how we would choose another child. We actually committed to a different child before Alanna. And right after we did we heard God, saying "that is not your child" The next day, I let Andrea know that we needed to change our minds. I felt silly.
Many of us RR Moms know how it feels to see a child that we think fits into what we imagine for our family or what we think we can handle, the age that we think is right, etc.... But God is telling us no. Then we see the family that committs to the child, and we know why. It is so obvious that is their child, that God chose for them.
One of the children we considered, (she is not the one we momentarily committed to), is sweet little Angie. Look at her family!! She looks like she was meant for them, love how God does that!
They are hosting a giveaway to help them raise the needed funds to adopt not Angie, but Neal also!!
Please consider going to their blog and making a donation to help them bring home their God choosen children.
I mean who doesn't want an Ipad2 or a 500.00 Amazon giftcard!!
http://jenkinschasingrainbows.blogspot.com/2011/05/enter-to-win.html?spref=fb

The Honeymoon is Over/Honesty Post

2011-05-20T22:02:00.001-04:00

Not for Alanna, for Anastasia. Overall she is adjusting so well to having a little sister, and having the attention shift from her, as our youngest on the timeline. (she is not the youngest our bios are 10 and 7, we adopted Anastasia 2 years ago and she is 9 now) She has only had one fit since us bringing Alanna home, a huge difference from before. She hasn't shown any jealousy. Well, Daddy was out of town for work this week and there is a lot of talk about our upcoming move. So of course, some sort of odd behaviour is to ensue. I will ask her something simple, like, "what do you want on your hot dog? *Blank Stare* "Anastasia there is no reason for you not to be answering me, what do you want on your hotdog?" She answers so softly I can't hear. Seriously!! This scenario repeated itself over and over all week. It's especially frustrating when she does it in front of other people, because it doesn't make any sense. I did call her out on it, and informed her that if she continued she would serve a punishment.
So tonight my husband let me rest while he took the baby and one child to go pick up pizza and prescriptions. When I woke up, my husband had told me about something that had occured while I was sleeping, something that was not a huge deal, but she had done it in order to get her dessert ASAP. It was a rule that her and I had discussed many times, but Daddy was not aware of. Big NO NO, don't play one parent off of another. So my husband and I called her into the living room to talk to her about it. Something she was not pleased about. She came, muttering under her breath the whole way. "Anastasia, what are you saying I can't hear you?" She says "I didn't say anything" "Anastasia I heard you, what were you saying?" "I wasn't saying anything Mommy reaaaallllyyyyy!" Both my husband and I asked her, same response. Then she said " I don't know what I was saying, I was talking so low, all I could hear was blah, blah, blah"
Anastasia think about what you are doing before you do it, you are lying, and you make no sense, this is your last chance to tell Mommy and Daddy what you said. "You never believe me, I'm telling the truth, I don't know what I said"
This is the 3rd time we have had this situation in the past week. The first was when my husband asked her not to do something and she did it anyways. It was not something that was a bad behavior just something he did not want her to do right then. She looked right at him and did it anyways. Then he asked her why she did it. Her response, "I didn't do it on purpose" It was not something you do on accident, she was 2 feet in front of him. She repeated over and over and stood her ground that she did not mean to do it.
So guess what my experienced, adoptive veteran Momma did, I sent her to bed. I just could not deal with it. I had a long week on my own with the kiddos, usually it goes smoothly this week, not so much, I am exhausted and just didn't feel like dealing with that behavior. When people say they admire me, I don't understand why. I am NOT the perfect parent. And I admit to you, that I am better at parenting some of my children than others. Adoptive parenting does not mean we have all the answers sometimes it means we ask God why he thought we were equipped to do this?
And let me tell you, for all adoptive parents, parenting an adoptive child is hard. If you have not done it you would not understand. Also let me tell you this, most adoptive kiddos who have behavior problems, do not have them for other people. Most behaviors are directed at the adoptive mothers, it's psychological, and somedays I handle it better than other days.
I am trying my hardest to be honest here. Several of my dearest adoptive friends have manned up and been honest about their struggles on their blogs. I had made the decision I would either be honest or stop blogging. These blogs are here for us to support each other. I realize it's like a reality sitcom to some, but to us adoptive parents, it is essential that we be honest with each other. Most of us feel pressured into making people think that we don't struggle. I find that I'm comfortable talking to people about struggles with my bio kids, but not my adoptive, because people will judge, like I've failed, or like I don't love her, etc... That's not the case, it's just real life we are living. And there are real people, really good parents, who are struggling and feel like they have nowhere to go, people with much bigger behaviors to deal with than us. We need to support each other.

Slow and Steady Gets You to Kirovograd

2011-05-14T09:06:00.000-04:00

and it is just as scary as getting there FAST.
Soo, after our SDA appt. We sat and had lunch with our facilitators. Walter was starving, but according to the "alignment of the stars..etc" he was not supposed to eat anything much, so he kept ordering tea and soup. And the man talked, A LOT. Very knowledgable about Ukrainian history. And he kept going back to being prepared because something unexpected was going to happen today, you know, because of the planets, err stars, etc
So we walk around the area a bit. Then out of nowhere Walter declares he is too tired to continue, and too tired to drive us back to our apartment. So he wants to flag us down a taxi. We tell him we will walk back to our apartment. We part ways, he calls to check to make sure we make it back, he is a very sweet man, but odd.
So, guess who is assigned to drive us to our region? Yep, Walter. And guess who doesn't know how to get there? And guess who borrows a GPS from a friend but can't figure out how to use it. And guess who is supposed to pick us up at 3 am and we have to call and wake him up at 4 am.
So finally he gets there to pick us up a little after 4. We drive about a mile down the road and he pulls over to ask someone where a gas station is. Umm, what? We haven't even left Kiev yet, you don't know where you are? And you're driving us 4.5 hours to our region? We get gas, he pulls over, at least 3 more times to ask directions and we get on the "freeway" And we are driving, in the dark, at 30 mph, everyone else is driving, like Ukrainians/Russians. I AM SCARED. And we are pulling over and asking for directions EVERYTIME he sees someone on the side of the road. Everytime he changes CDs or answers the phone he pulls over to the side. Then he swerves into oncoming traffic, going 30 mph. I start crying. So my husband texts our facilitator to call Walter and check on him.
And he does 2 hours later. And we are pulling over at least once a mile. I'm not kidding, to ask for directions. I'm not convinced we are anywhere near where we need to go, and I think we may end up in Russia. We get to Kirovograd, 7 hours later. 3.5 hours longer than it takes the other drivers.
On the way back to Kiev we requested Walter not drive us, I just couldn't take it again. We had our cab driver from our region drive us, he was 50.00 cheaper, and a super skilled driver. That drive was equally as scary. I felt like we were in a video game the way he drove those roads, weaving in and out of traffic. But that is what we are used to when it comes to our Ukrainian/Russian drivers.
We did see Walter again. He drove us to our Embassy appt. We were 45 minutes late. Just so you know, you can call the embassy and let them know you are running late, it was not a big deal. You know, just in case you end up having Walter drive you.
We love Walter, he's part of our story, and unlike anyone we've ever met over there.

You gotta tell me these things

2011-05-04T21:54:00.000-04:00

Like when I name a post "The Rabbit and the Hare" Kids eat brain cells, so I don't have many left. So fixed it, except I couldn't wrap my brain around how to spell tortoise, or whatever, ugh

The Tortoise and the Hare..driving a car....

2011-05-04T10:32:00.002-04:00

I elaborate on that more in a minute. In country you will most likely have several different drivers. Of course, there is the ever famous Niko. Niko is the bomb driver, he is a little older, very experienced and knows his stuff, also very easy going and nice.
So Niko had told us about a guys I am going to call "walter" not his real name, just go with it. So, Niko says he "knows a guy" who can give us a great tour of Kiev, the capitol while we are staying there, this guy knows great English. So we hire said guy, Walter. First of all Walter has an issue, with his car. His car alarm goes off ohhhh, every 10-30 seconds when he is not in it. Why? Not sure. So Walter picks us up and takes us to our SDA appt. Right across from the SDA is a huge souvenir market. There, Walter "knows a guy" who sells souvenirs. We are pressured to buy souvenirs from him and only him. Slightly uncomfortable, but they are very nice and know great english. "The guys" with the souvenors tease Walter about his car alarm going off, they tell us it always does this. When we walk away to go to our SDA appt Walter leaves his keys with the souvenor guys so they can turn his alarm off, should it happen to go off while he's inside with us. Oh, ya did I mention that Walter was not able to park his car, the souvenor guy did it for him after Walter tried several times. I'm a girl, I could have done on my first try, my grandma could have done it on her first try.
If you were wondering, in this story Walter is the Tortoise,
I have to go clean while the baby is sleeping.
To Be Continued.............................................................

For Me

2011-05-01T08:26:00.000-04:00

Every once in a while I look at my hubby and ask him "can you believe WE get to keep her?" To say we are in love is an understatement.
People comment to me all the time how in love we look (Alanna and I) hehe, and we are, like a newborn and mother getting to know each other.
I kiss her toes, breath in her breath, memorize the color of her eyes, squeeze her chubby legs, hug her close, press her cheeks against mine, etc... It is like God made her for me, my child. And the thing is, He did, as her birth mother carried her in her womb, as she lay in a hospital with no visitors, then in an oprhanage crib for 15 months, God already knew she was mine. Because first of all she is His, and we had prayed for another child, and He knew the perfect one.
Sorry, I tend to get sentimental on Sundays. Ha!

Eating Skills

2011-04-27T08:47:00.000-04:00

Many people ask questions about what she can and can't do. I understand that people are curious, especially if they don't know anything about how down syndrome effects development. The easiest way to explain it is, whatever it is, she will do, it will just take longer. You know how babies go through stages, it's so much fun, but it goes by so fast, we get to linger and enjoy longer!
I have no anxiety over what she will do when, but when she does the smallest things, we all rejoice with her.
She's got a pincher grasp, on one hand, but refuses to use it while eating!

First she tries to simply hover over the food and see if it will come to her.
She will pick up the food, and try to put it in her mouth, sometimes she succeeds, sometimes not. Either way, it's always cute.

Giardia Beware Poopy Post

2011-04-27T08:32:00.000-04:00

Yes, sometimes you bring home some little unwelcome guests. So makes sure that your pediatrician orders a stool test. Alanna's came back psoitive for Giardia. It's a parasite caused by dirty water, and since it lives in the intestines, it is passed easily in any "daycare" type setting.
She didn't look like she was having any symptoms, no loose stool, the opposite as a matter of fact.
Then she got diagnosed, and it was like all of sudden she was having oily loose stools. But she is such a healthy chubby little thing, it didn't seem like it could be making her very sick.

Well, she's been on the medicine for 3 days now, and guess what.
That acid reflux, gone! Before I couldn't even give her the smallest amount of juice/water, it came back up like a volcano. She was constantly spitting up, and she had 3 episodes of vomiting. All symptoms of Giardia, who knew?

It is Wednesday morning, and the last time I saw her spit up anything was Sunday. She must be feeling so much better!
And yet, things like this make me so sad, there are hundreds, thousands, of babies, not only all alone in a crib, but suffering from the most treatable things, that are causing them so much pain.

Cool Story

2011-04-27T08:24:00.000-04:00

Cool Story: I was on the phone the other morning with the lady who does the referals at our pediatricians office. She asked why I needed a referal for PT. I said "she has Down Syndrome" She then asked me "are these girls you have adopted relatives?"
I told her no, and she told me how much she admires me, that always makes me a little uncomfortable Then she exclaimed ý"I was sitting behind the CUTEST baby with DS at church yesterday!
Me:"umm, what church did you go to yesterday?" Her "Lifepoint, in Byron" Me: "That was ME!"
She was not expecting that.(neither was I) She said her and her husband had the hardest time paying attention because the baby was cute and the Mommy looked so in love. Then she said "you are blonde right?" LIke she was still having a hard time believing it was me. Haha, "yes, this week I am blonde"
The funniest thing is, our pastor had opened service talking about how you don't know how you might affect the people sitting behind you.
Oh, my, I have no idea why a child with DS needed to impact that lady on Sunday, but I feel honored it was us!

Her Mama

2011-04-17T10:31:00.000-04:00

People have asked if she shows attachment, andy knowledge of who her Mama and Daddy are. Yes!!
A couple days ago she started crying whenever I put her down, uh oh!! Ha, I love it! And she doesn't cry long if I don't go back and get her, which I do about half the time, it's hard not to!
I don't think I've explained exactly how unconnected she was to everything when we met her.
Some things we have been working on:

Encouraging her to crawl to us. She had no clue to do this, if nooone ever picks you up or interacts with you, why would you?

Encouraging her to put her arms up when we go to pick her up. You know, how babies do that.

And of course, as you already know from my last post, smiling for joy!

Last night we were at a friends house for dinner. She was a little cranky. She was playing on the floor, kind of happy kind of not, everyone had played with her trying to cheer her up, but she was not her usual happy self. I was sitting in a chair, I leaned down, and said something to her. She looked up and saw me and got the biggest smile and inch wormed crawled as fast as she could to me, then stuck her arms as high up as they would go for me to pick her up!
It was one of the best things ever!!
Yes, she know who her Mama is! And this morning when I woke up, Gary was holding her and she reached out for me!! Poor Daddy. Hehehe.

Teaching her to laugh

2011-04-14T21:22:00.000-04:00

The poor baby did not know how to laugh when we met her. Nothing we did could make her laugh. When we tickled her she would scream, like a "Oh my goodness what in the world was that" at the top of her lungs scream. Then she progressed to like a happy sigh grunt thing. Over the past week I would hear her at times kind of laughing, almost like she was practicing, the kind of laugh that sounds like a machine gun trying to clear it's throat. And when we tickled her she would no longer scream instead we would get half a laugh, then she would tense up and no longer be ticklish.
Same goes for the smile. She never smiled when we met her. Then there were certain things we could do to make her smile, like caress her cheek. But NEVER just a smile that wasn't provoked by something physical.
Now, she smiles! In the morning when I go over to her crib. When I pick her up. When I give her kisses. When she sees the dog coming over to play with her. And today, I can say she was laughing. When I made the tickle sound and she would see my hands coming I would get a big smile and some "laughing" still not totally natural sounding, but laughing.

Makes my day, every single time.

2 for 1, maybe more!

2011-04-14T15:32:00.001-04:00

I plan on doing some blog catch up, so today you will at least be getting 2 for 1!!
Yesterday my older daughter had her PT appt. Of course everyone there was eager to meet Alanna and get their hands on her. They did not do a formal eval on her (soon though). But they said she looks great. Great tone and very strong. They think her physical delays will be on the mild end of the spectrum. People keep asking me about this, and I was clueless. We think she is doing great for a child who has been in a crib for 15 months but beyond that, we just didn't know due to lack of experience.
They got her to do some weight bearing. She looked like such a big girl standing there with them only holding her legs for balance.
To me she is comparable to a 7-8 month old physically. She can sit, army crawl, roll over, sit from lying down.
Let me clarify, that we are not waiting on pins and needles to see how "delayed" her development will be. She is perfect to us, and we are just enjoying her no matter what pace her development is.

Here are some pictures of us showing Daddy her big girl standing.
And she turned 16 months old yesterday!!

You Poor Neglected Readers!

2011-04-12T14:43:00.000-04:00

I know, I thought I would never be one of those Moms who came home and didn't blog for a week! I have not forgotten about you we've just been so busy!
I will have to break down the last week into several posts!
First off, Ms. Alanna is doing great! She is absolutely one of the sweetest, most content, lovable babies EVER! I get teary eyed every day just thinking about how blessed we are to have her.

Let me try to break it down for you, I may run out of time, I need to pick the kids up from school in a bit, take Cooper to get his allergy shot, then take Alanna's stool sample to the lab. (the life of a Mom)

The Plane Ride Home:

Even though we had to wake at 3 am to drive to the airport she fought sleep until our second flight! She made it through a 2 hour flight and a 4 hour lay over, with no more than a couple 10 minute naps! She was a little cranky, but not bad at all!! She was just too busy watching everything around her! Our second flight was 10 hours and she did great, she slept, maybe half of it, and just played the rest. Her reflux was horrible. I was covered in spit up from head to toe, or at least I felt like I was! She never cries about it, it just comes right back up.

Homecoming:

We got home around 9 pm. Our other 3 kiddos were waiting up for us, along with my dear friend who had kept my kids and her 4 kiddos. Alanna slept through the whole thing!! They still said how cute she was, but there was no waking her up, and she slept through the night!

How is She Sleeping?

Many people ask this. She is doing AWESOME! She tried so hard not to sleep during the day because she was taking everything in. So around 1 pm she would be exhausted. She would take a long afternoon nap, sometimes we would have to wake her so she wouldn't sleep into dinner time. Then she goes to bed around 8-8:30. She has never woken in the middle of the night. Now she naps in the car sometimes, and sometimes she falls asleep while playing on the floor. But for the most part she takes 1 good nap in her crib everyday.

Eating:

She's eating good. She loves her bottle! We are giving her whole milk with rice cereal to thicken it. This has helped tremendously with the reflux. She is eating some baby food, some table food, and 3 bottles every day. Any DS Mommas have feeding advice? What milk is healthiest for her? Vitamins? Supplements? Leave me comment!!
At what age did your child with DS go off the bottle? I'm in no hurry just curious.
The only 2 times I have given her juice/water she has vomited it back up. Today it happened as I was walking out the door. I walked back in, held her over the sink while she finished, then grabbed a towel and kept going, my other daughter had an dr appt! Things are totally different the more kids you have, sometimes you have to just keep going! She was fine after that.

What do our other kids think about her?

They are in LOVE with her! More than we thought possible. And they are not the only ones. It's not unusual for me to walk into the living room to find a neighborhood kid sitting playing with her. They are all super sweet with her. I am afraid what her being the youngest by so many years and so darn cute might mean! It will be a miracle if she is not spoiled rotten. We will try to find a healthy balance between spoiled and rotten!!

Does she seem happy and adjusted?

Yes, I can honestly say he does! She almost never cries. She is just a really easy baby.

Tomorrow she has a doctors appt. I will try to post tomorrow with more about her developement and things like that!
If you have any questions, post them in the comment section (you don't need an account to do it) and I will try to answer them tomorrow)

An easy ticket out!

2011-04-05T14:01:00.000-04:00

Well, we are headed home. It's almost 9 pm here on Tuesday, our driver will be here around 3 am to take us to the airport!
We had our appt at the embassy here on Monday, then went and did her medical. And today we went and got her Visa. They said it would take about 45 mintues to an hour to print. But 10 minutes later we were on our way!
We met a family who was adopting 2 teenagers who were hosted through New Horizons, the same organization we hosted Anastasia through 2.5 years ago. It was nice to talk to them, and to meet their new children!

I was so struck by what I saw yesterday, at the embassy of all places!
A parking lot full of people, people hoping to go somewhere. To live, to visit, both I'm sure. But it is not easy, impossible for many actually.
Especially a single young woman. They have to provide proof that they are not leaving to get married, and not come back here! Proof they own property, proof they have something to come back to!
There were several lines, and another just mass of people. Our driver walked us in front of all them, we didn't have to wait in any of those lines. Alanna has an easy ticket out of here! And not to say here is horrible, the inability to choose for yourself is what is horrible! You think we have to paperchase, and wait, and jump through hoops to adopt? Try being a citizen here and want to go travel. It can take years. We met a family with 2 young children, citizen of this country. They said it will take them 4 years!!
I was so bothered by this. Why is America so privilaged? So we can buy bigger cars and bigger houses and 5.00 cups of coffee every day? Why did God choose us to have the freedom and rights we do?
They only thing that was layed on my heart was "maybe He thought we would do something with it"
Hmm, maybe He trusted us to do something with it. And I'm not just talking about adoption, adoption is not the only something. But there seems to be a lot of nothing happening too.

Even More Pictures!!

2011-04-03T08:50:00.000-04:00

One of my absolute favorites

Daddy Love

She loves bathtime, but we have to hold her up, because she bends over to lick/drink the water I need to buy one of those bathtub chairs

Notice what her PJs say?

LOTS of Pictures!

2011-04-03T07:31:00.000-04:00

She licks everything. Including the floor. She no longer falls over while sitting up!

People with Down Syndrome, have a larger than typical gap between their toes, you can see it in the picture below. It is so precious, she wiggles her toes all the time.

Gotcha Day

2011-04-02T14:25:00.000-04:00

Sorry I didn't get to posting yesterday, busy taking care of my girl!
Gotcha day went smoothly. We went and picked up her birth certificate. Then went to the bank to shut down her government assistance account that all orphans with special needs recieved. The money is donated to the orphanage by us, and this particular orphanage likes to go with the parents to purchase things directly for the orphanage. Which is nice to know the money is going to the proper place. Someone from the orphanage went with us, and basically she shopped and we paid. We bought some shoes, and over 1,000 in towels and sheets.
Then we went and got our girl! We changed her clothes and got her schedule, for sleeping and eating, and her medical run down again, signed some papers, etc.... They leave the orphanage with nothing, not even a clean diaper. We changed her clothes and several people came in to say their goodbyes. We had our translator ask if we could see her group room, and at first they said yes, then they said no. Very frustrating to have never seen where your daughter lived, but OK.
She is a sweet angel baby. She seems to struggle with some reflux, she doesn't cry about it, it just comes back up!
She doesn't seem to like the baby food or rice cereal we brought. But she ate some of my chicken and mashed potatoes at lunch and she drinks milk from a bottle.

We made the racecar drive back to the capitol city today. It was a crazy drive, but we trusted our driver.

I am now a mother of...

2011-03-31T15:37:00.000-04:00

4!!

Court was successful! We got a yes, and the 10 days was waived. This is one of the few regions that waives the 10 days. The plan is to finish paperchasing tomorrow for her new birth certificate and passport, then we pick her up from the orphanage!!!

Saturday we head back to the capitol city, then hopefully we do her medical and visa, and we could be leaving to go home as soon as Wednesday!!

Shhh..don't tell my kids yet, I don't want to get their hopes up if something happens.

More pictures tomorrow, I PROMISE.

Oh, and a little funny. Our lawyer today told us we are more than welcome to stay here longer instead of going back to the capitol (we are renting a room from her)

What she said was translated by our translator to say "but Serge says you are boring here, so you want to leave"

Haha, I don't think I'm boring, do you?

Court Tomorrow!

2011-03-30T13:01:00.000-04:00

We have court tomorrow! Thursday at 2pm.
I'm feeling very emotional tonight as I realize tomorrow I will be given a precious gift from God, to be entrusted to be Alanna's Mommy.
Whew, and how the heck did I become a mother of 4?!? Hehe, just kiddin, kind of!
The plan as of now is to have court tomorrow. Then Friday will be Gotcha Day. They encouraged us to wait out the weekend, but we are really eager to get back to the capitol city where we can walk everywhere and not have to pay a driver to go every little place. Our region is wonderful don't get me wrong, but boredom takes it's toll!
I'm sorry I have no new pics to share. She has been sleeping through most of our visits, I think they fall during nap time and then with the time change here this past weekend it has really done her in.

These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things....

2011-03-27T12:46:00.000-04:00

My name is Alanna and my favorite new thing is my Mommy and Daddy. Everyday they come to see me. Me and my Mommy have a tradition now, as soon as she gets me we sit down. Then I look at her right in her eyes (I didn't used to do that). Then I get a little grin on my face (I didn't used to do that either) Then I remember that all I have to do is lean my head to the side and Mommy blows raspberries on my neck!! It makes me smile so big!! I love it, and I remember every morning now, and that makes Mommy smile. After we do that I lay my head on her chest and cuddle for a couple minutes.

Then she hands me over to my Daddy. If I look at my Daddy real cute (which is easy for me) Then he will give me belly pats, or my absolute favorite a back massage!! He gave me 30 minute back massage yesterday. I just lay there real still.

I hear I have a sister and 2 brothers waiting for me at home. I can't wait! Tell them I like kisses and back rubs!

Tipping

2011-03-27T00:29:00.000-04:00

I had forgotten what we were told last time we adopted about tipping over here. It's kind of good to know when you go and pay the bill, what is expected. Especially since you will probably frequent certain restaurants that you are comfortable with.
I guess the bottom line is that tipping is not expected, 15% is normal when you do tip.

Doesn't really make sense, but it gives you a guideline. But let me tell you, I enjoy tipping over here. It is a great chance to really bless someone, and make their day, with only a couple dollars. We tipped the girl almost 20% at one of the nicer resaurants here. We sat at her table a long time, using our computer, and we ordered refills on our "colas" GASP she was super sweet and patient.
The girl blushed so hard when she saw her tip! Made my day!

Days 4 and 5

2011-03-25T17:18:00.000-04:00

I guess our groundhog days have officially started, you who have adopted from here know what I'm talking about. At first we were told our court would be Monday or Tuesday next week,now they say Thursday/Friday next week. Enough on that before I start a pity party. Hehe, really I just miss home and more than anything my other kids.

Yesterday Alanna was very tired during our visits. We saw her cry for the first time. During our afternoon visit she started crying about 10-15 minutes before it was time for them to come get her. It was a screaming cry, like something was wrong, but we did not have a clue what. I couldn't believe they didn't come sooner, because she was LOUD! And it was heartbreaking!

But today she was Miss Content again. We tryed to tone down the stimulation a bit, I think she is getting too much of it and she is overwhelmed. If any of you have ever seen Gary play with kids, you know this is hard for him, but he has learned quickly. We have noticed she stimms quite a bit, but we are finding things to replace this, like taking her hand and massaging it, etc.... Half way into our morning visit she fell asleep on me. She went into a deep sleep, thumb fell out of the mouth and everything! They had brought her to us 15 minutes late so I think the caregiver was trying to be nice and let us keep her later, but we had to meet with city council and we needed to leave. So at 15 after we carried her down to the front office, and they called her caregiver to come get her.
I think she must have stayed asleep because she was not tired during our afternoon visit. We had to sit in the hall and wait for the visiting room. A mother walked out smelling strongly of smoke and perfume, I think it was a birthmother visiting her child. Then they came and got her 45 minutes early, They explained, that there was another Mama and Papa that needed the room. Umm, I know they have other room, but we had a little over an hour with her, so we just kissed her goodbye and off she went.
This orphanage allows us to come on the weekend so that is great!

A note about city council: this region works a little differently. One of the things is we have to meet with the city council, they review our paperwork ahead of time, ask us some questions, 5-10 mintues worth, then vote, yes vote, like raise your hand if you approve of this adoption. They questioned us for not even 5 minutes, then voted, all positive!

Day 3 in Region

2011-03-24T15:12:00.000-04:00

Yes, I'm running a day behind. We had great visits on Wednesday. Everyday we visit from 9-10 and
1-3. We could tell she was somewhat sleepy. I mean just imagine she has never had so much one on one attention in her life.
So, I think I mentioned she can pretty much sit up, falls over once in a while (we catch her)
I have layed her on her belly and she pushes up on her hands and looks around. I thought that was pretty good, we really weren't even expecting her to be able to sit up. Yesterday I put her on her belly away from her toys, and the girl army crawled to them, FAST!! And she gets up on all fours and rocks back and forth.
She has a pincher grip with her right hand, not her left though, that I've seen.
She puts weight on her legs and will stand with us holding her hands.
She leans in for kisses now. I do this thing where I make a sound with my lips then I give her rasperries on her neck. She loves it! Now when I make the noise she tilts her head to the side and just waits.

She truly is amazing. What child spends their life in an orphanage from the time they are a month old and has hardly and delays? Determined she is! Yes I know that will probably get her into some mischeif later on.
And yes I let Gary hold her..... for a little bit

Day 2 in Region

2011-03-22T13:54:00.010-04:00

Our visits have been moved to the small visiting room. Thank goodness we have some toys with us. And she loves toys! She can sit up, and even dance while she's doing it, but if she reaches for something she falls over. For our afternoon visit she it looked like they had to wake her up. She was still sleepy. She kept sucking her thumb and laying on us then she would sit back up trying to keep herself awake! She is very busy, if there is something within her sight she is going to try to get to it!
Eventually she gave in and fell asleep on me...bestill my heart.

Day 1 in Region

2011-03-22T13:34:00.002-04:00

Sorry for the wait everybody! We are staying in a very nice home, but we couldn't figure out how to get the internet to work. We got the cable internet to work in one of the other bedrooms and since it is vacant we are using it for now. I will say shortly, do not hate me other adoptive parents. We are staying in a VERY nice house. Very custom, just remodeled, and very comfortable. It is a house made to service probably 4-5 families at a time, but we are the only ones here right now. I don't like not being able to walk places, but it is a short cab ride to anywhere we need to go. And one of our most humorous luxuries is ice cubes, yes ice cubes people, made from bottled water, individually wrapped, no joke! And...there is a hottub...in the house...no joke again.
More on that another day. Oh, and more on how we go to the region another day too, most amusing/scary it will have to be a post in and of itself!
After arriving in region we were taken straight to our lawyer's office, in this region, you must have a lawyer, Serge and his team do not charge extra for this, but they do pay her! Since we arrived in region several hours later than expected we had to rush. We waited shortly once we got to the orphanage then we were taken to the director's office. She had no time to ask questions, but I could tell she was very kind, and so was everyone else. There were several other people in the room including a regional translator, again we were not asked to pay her. The doctor sat down to read her file to us. As soon as that happened a caretaker walked in with Alanna and sat down across the room with her. I kept looking at the doctor, trying not to be rude. Finally Serge says, you can go get her!! Kiss her!! Hug her!! Oh, thank goodness.

She is soo precious, she kept putting her hand on my mouth so I was kissing her hand and she kept doing it. After everyone was done giving us info., they let us play with her in one of the playrooms for about 10 minutes. The first couple times we handed her something it fell right out of her hand after a couple seconds. The translator said "they said she can reach for something but not keep hold of it" PSHH.. I showed her once by putting my hand around hers and shaking it so it would rattle. Problem solved. She now holds things for as long as she wants to, reaches, switches hands, etc... As a matter of fact there is little we can keep away from her. We are head over heels in love with her.

So Close but yet so far away!

2011-03-17T17:09:00.000-04:00

Well, it's Thursday night here. We should be trying to sleep, but sleep was pretty unsuccessful last night so we gave in and took a nap today.
Our SDA appt was this morning and was a success, no unexpected hurdles, whew! We got a new picture of Alanna and man is she just so beautiful. It seems like the days are just dragging, due to how the system works here. We had our SDA appt today, but we can't pick up the paperwork giving us permission to visit her until tomorrow afternoon, then it's the weekend. So we will be leaving here very early, like 3-4 am early Monday to drive to her region. I'm not sure I've ever felt so impatient in my life!

We are here

2011-03-16T07:30:00.000-04:00

It's around 1 pm here. We arrived last night, late. Niko picked us up and took us the grocery store, then to our apartment. I will try to make this blog as informative for other families as possible
. As soon as he picked us up he took us to a grocery store to get some food/water and exchange money. Have around 150 dollars to exhange so that you can get some food and pay Niko for the ride from the airport and the minutes on your phone. That was 290 Grivna's. Niko speaks some English and he is very kind and informative. We got water, meat, cheese, chocolate, of course, bread, and yogurt. We made sandwiches last night since we hadn't eaten. It was good, we did not get sick from the change in food or anything.
Our apartment is fine, not as nice as we had for our last adoption, but it will work.
I would def suggest brining a queen fitted sheet. Waking up to find the flat sheet they use as a fitted sheet has shifted and you are no laying on the mattress is kind of gross, no matter what country you are in.
Our kitchen has a stove, fridge, and even a microwave.
It also has a handy dandy water warmer thing. I brought Starbucks via with me, which although is a little pricey, it is worth it, not having to go walking for coffee. It is already lightly sweetened so I brought those and individual powdered creamer.
The interenet we have is the cable kind, we had to turn off the modem and turn it back on to get it to work. They left the password for us. Works fine!
We slept from aroudn 2 am last night to 12:30 pm here. I took melatonin and slept great!
When I logged into the computer another RR family who is here was on facebook, so I chatted with the wife and we will meet up with them later!How cool is that.
The stinky part is since our SDA appt is not until Thursday and we don't pick up our referral until Friday, we have to stay in the capitol till Monday morning, then drive to meet Alanna. It seems like a forever wait!!
If you think of any questions just post them in the comment section!!
Off to shower and go walking. We have all the windows open, it is beautiful outside!

8 Days!

2011-03-06T10:59:00.000-05:00

Not that I'm counting. We are spending our days nesting, Getting ready for a baby and a long trip, And soaking in our kiddos, we are going to miss them like crazy. Alanna is getting some great older siblings, and man are they excited. I do however want to apologize ahead of time for the fact that her brothers immediately decided that "Alanna the Pirana" is soooo funny, and it rhymes and they say like hundred times a day. They are 7 and 10, so they will not forget, I'm sorry but it will probably stick.

Everything has come together. When we first decided to start this journey we doubted our ability to gather money, childcare, etc... Well, it has all come together! Our friends and family are awesome. Some of them may still feel apprehensive, and although that saddens me, I cannot wait to see them fall in love with our Alanna!

In 12 days.....

2011-03-02T11:02:00.000-05:00

We are leaving for you-know-where!! We are so excited. And running around like crazies trying to get everything ready! Whew lots to do. When you only have a month to prepare for the arrival of a baby!
Oh, and for you adoptive mommy's looking for timelines, We were submitted on Feb 17th and our SDA appt is March 17th. We will leave here on the 14th, so that we can be there by the 15th, in case of any delays in flights, better safe than sorry.

Name

2011-02-21T08:59:00.000-05:00

Oops, I realized I "released" the name on Facebook, but never came back and posted it here!

Our baby girl's name will be .............................

Alanna Nicole

Alanna is pronuonced Uh-Lah-Nuh

Ye of Little Faith

2011-02-18T23:20:00.000-05:00

It has come to my attention that some people feel lead to judge us due to the fact that
1.we committed to another child so fast
2. that our new child has DS

Some of our family and friends seem to have no faith in me. Some of my family and friends act like they don't know. Like they don't know my heart, and that my family is of utmost importance.

So, although I don't feel like I need to explain, I will. Because I like our story and I think it's important.

How Did I First Become Interested In Learning about Down Syndrome?
Oh, well since you asked, let me tell you!! Over 2 years ago, I ran into this bloghttp://thebalsisfamily.blogspot.com/
This is my sweet cyber friend Bethany's blog. She had adopted from St. Petersburg Russia and at the time we were in process of adopting Anastasia, I was obsessed with reading blogs. When I clicked on her blog, I found more than just an adoption blog, I found a blog about a family who had a beautiful little girl who happened to have DS, and they went all the way to Russia and adopted another precious angel who also happened to have DS. They are 2 of the most precious children ever, ( as is her son also) This was new to me, I knew little about DS and little about DS adoption.

It was her blog, that lead me to Reeces Rainbow. So know not only was I following many Russian adoption blogs, but also adoption blogs about families adding children with DS, and for many of them they were adding more to their own biological. I saw what a blessing these children were.

I made more friends, friends like Leah, http://gardenofeagan.blogspot.com/

I followed her blog and she followed my adoption blog while we adopted Anastasia.
Then we brought Anastasia home, and I was very busy, happily so, training up our new child.

Then my husband Deployed
This was over a year ago. I spent many hours on Reeces Rainbow. Looking at children and reading adoption blogs. The majority of which were about childre with DS. I had talked to Gary about if he would ever consider adopting a child with DS, he said probably not. OK Every once in a while I would send him pictures of a little girl I thought was cute. Every one of those girls got a family. I might add we were not even thinking about adopting any time soon.
Then there was a little girl that went by the name "Dawn" well, a baby actually, with mild CP. Our Ella!
We were comfortable with CP. I continued to show hubby picture of Ella. I asked him again about DS, again he said no. But yet I looked at all the waiting children, over and over.
Then hubby came home, and shortly after they posted new pictures of Ella, she had just turned 2. We had baby fever, we were comfortable with CP, we kept looking at her picture and we committed to adopt her. Our hearts were in it, totally I don't want to lead anyone to believe otherwise.

Mother's Intuition

Mother's intuition is a gift from God, and I believe in it. The entire time we were committed to Ella, I felt guarded, very guarded. I did not buy anything. I did not get anything ready. I made sure to tell the kids over and over again that Ella could be adopted by someone else and that then we would have to adopt a different baby. We knew this could happen. But why did my heart focus on it? And why did Cooper's heart focus on it? My 6 year old brought up again and again, I hope nooone else adopts her, over time it lead to him saying he thought someone else would adopt her!!

God's Timing, it's not ours, and that is what makes it perfect!

We found out in October that she was not clear for adoption, that was 4 months ago. Never when I mailed off paperwork, or reached a milestone, did I feel freely excited, I still just felt guarded. I wanted to adopt another child, I had strong feelings, that this was not our child, I shared with my husband and my best friend, over and over. I emailed RR to get information on several other children, I think all of them had DS. Hmmmm....
Hubby talked me into staying with Ella. I felt God telling me to listen to my husband and that although the road was not leading me where I thought I wanted, it was leading me and to stay on course. And still, I would read mostly the DS blogs, and still look at the waiting babies with DS. Learning more and more and falling more and more in love.
The morning they went to submit our paperwork for Ella, the day we found out that she was being adopted by a french couple. I was driving the kids to school, praying, talking to God, I was thinking gee I guess I was wrong, I guess she is our child. Then that afternoon I got the email, confirming that she was not. I spent the day laying in my bed, grieving.
After dinner we called the kids up onto our bed to share the news with them, my stomach was in knots, I did not want my children to be sad, I hate that. As my youngest, was crawling up to the bed, he said "I think I already know what you are going to say" I guess he's got a brother's intuition.
The next day I felt so lost, of course grief, but I did not feel mad. Strange right. We didn't know what we would do. Our paperwork would expire the next week. We either had to submit or redo most of our paperwork.
I did not feel lead toward any of the RR children. None of the ones we could consider anyways. Hubby still said no to DS, and we hadn't even put it on our homestudy. We strongly considered several other girls with a totally seperate special need.We actually told RR we wanted to committ to one of them. God shouted NO. Seriously you can think I'm strange, but I felt God shout at me, NO, that is not your child. We backed out the next day. That was Saturday. I had come to the conclusion that we must wait, I would redo our paperwork and we would just wait to see what we were supposed to do.

Sweet Dreams

Every night after we lost Ella I had some very realistic dreams, Dreams I was holding a baby, a baby with DS.
Sunday while getting ready for church I broke down crying. My husband demanded I tell him what was wrong, I didn't believe in trying to talk him into something. That man tells me no very seldom, and I try hard to respect him when he does. I just kept telling him it was nothing, Then he held me and said I had to tell him, please.
So I did, it all came pouring out. He said he did not realize how strongly I felt. And that he trusted me, and for me to educate him on DS, and he would surely consider. I didn't have to educate that man on anything. His heart opened right there, I could tell that he felt the same way I felt. That all of a sudden we knew what to do.
I had emailed early that morning to get more info on several children with DS, torturing myself I guess.
Later that day when I opened that email, that had more pictures, we both fell instantly in love with our child. All felt right, no apprehension, no guard.We waited till the next morning to committ, and I felt so excited!!

I know all that happened fast, I may have judged you had you done the same thing.

Noone lost

We are on cloud 9. Ella has a family, the family God chose for her. And we truely believe we are this little girl's family. We are so in love, so happy, so excited!! And above all so BLESSED.

Now, maybe if you're nice to me I'll tell you what we are going to name her!!

I didn't really want to come here.

2011-02-12T21:30:00.000-05:00

This is like "Ella's place" Her picture is everywhere. I didn't really want to come here. But I want to explain what happened. First of all I felt guarded all throughout this process, not about the process but about Ella. Not putting up her bed, not posting on here to often, I had a certain gut feeling. But I knew God was leading us for a reason, so I followed. So, Ella was not meant to be ours. When I opened the email, I did not feel surprised at all, not sure why.
The email basically said that when they went to submit our paperwork this past Thursday (yep I didn't even post about that) that they had were told that a french couple had viewed her file, met her, and were moving forward with her adoption. ????????????
Well, see, most of the time when someone adopts from these EE countries, the traditional way to do it is to submit for a "blind referal" meaning your the one who is blind. You list the ages, special needs, gender, etc.. that you are wanting to adopt. The give you adate to come to the country and they show you a file.
Her file was supposed to be set aside for us when she cleared for adoption last month. Some law changed.
She was not our child, we are not angry. It can't be a mistake, God does not give people children by mistake.
We are sad and grieving the loss of the idea that she was our child.
What is next?
We are praying about that. We think we will move forward with for a different waiting child. You see our paperwork expires in a week and a half, so next week is the last week it can be submitted without me redoing a lot of paperwork. Not that I'm not willing.
So, we've got a couple ideas, but we won't be revealing them right now.
We are doing good, the kids are doing good. They don't want to give up and neither do we.

Do Something Specific-Caution Truth Ahead

2011-01-13T22:24:00.000-05:00

I am calling my friends and family to do something, it doesn't have to be big, The great thing about doing something small is that when enough people do it, it ends up being BIG!!
The truth is most people don't want to know the truth. There are children dying. There is noone to take care of them, their countries are poor, we are rich, You may not think you are rich, trust me, if you are reading this you are rich. And if you're like me and most Americans you are spoiled. Children are helpless. When they are put into a crib for so long that their body is bent and stiffened, they are helpless. When they are put into a mental institution at the age of 4, they are helpless. When there is not enough food, they are helpless. When there is noone to change them out of their own excriment, they are helpless. And you can help, don't tell me that you can't.

To tell you the truth I'm feeling a little angry. First off Gary and I never set out to save a children, we don't feel like we have saved Anastasia, and we don't feel like we are saving Ella. However, the fact is if Anastasia was still where she came from, she would be in an institution. With no hope. I think maybe when I say institution you are picturing something a little different than what the reality is.Maybe you are picturing a playground, I mean, it might be an institution, but they are children right? My children like playgrounds.

I'm not being dramatic. This is an actual playground, at an institution, where a dear fellow adoptive parent rescued her 6 year old son. You would not believe what this family went through to bring their child home, it is not normal practice to adopt from the institutions. Normally that means the end of hope for finding a family. Can you imagine the end of hope looking like this?

No? This is a beautiful child of God. And if you want to read how God softened hearts and moved mountains to get him here, go read here http://covenantbuilders.blogspot.com/2010_10_01_archive.html

His mother now has a passion like noone else for the lost boys. She has seen what you and I cannot imagine. What we think just does not exist, it couldn't, right?

So, what am asking of you in specific? Help save a Lost Boy. Actually my prayer is that his Mommy and Daddy can get to him before he is sent to the institution. He has turned 5, they are traditionally sent at 4. Some of the baby homes will hold on to them as long as they can, can you blame them? They are helpless.

This is Brian, Oh bestill my heart, he is precious. My heart wrenches at the thought of him in that institution. And that is where he will be if his parents don't get there quickly. Why is it Brian that pulls on my heart to badly? Because he is in the same baby home with our Ella. They may play together. They may eat together. When we were chosen for Ella, my heart cried for Brian, I wondered "why were we not chosen for him" He is so close to becoming lost.

The picture above is where he will go. To join that group of lost boys. One so small that the caregiver has to hold his hand so he doesn't wander away to explore. And some to big, they look like grown men, well they are.
Do you see that tiny boy holding the woman's hand in the back of the line? That was Brian's buddy, he was lost, sent to the insitution. He was lifted up in prayer, by people who would not forget, and people gave, because they could feel and know the realness of this. That is Brady, and his Momma has found him, he will not be lost anymore. I don't want Brian to take his place, I don't want him ever to be lost.

Still does not seem real to you? Do you know me personally? Do you Anastasia? She would have been lost. Did she not deserve better, would she not have been worth it?

So very specifically I ask you to go here http://missyb-itsawonderfullife.blogspot.com/2010/11/this-is-our-little-brian-please-pray.html to Brian's Momma's blog.
Go to the chip on the right that says "For Paperwork" pray about what you can give, and do it.
Brian's family needs the money to get a very important piece of paperwork taken care of, the process is halted until they can mail that in. Minutes are hours, and days are years for Brian.
**Please when making donations make sure to go to the one that says "paperwork" the other chip in is for money that can only be used when they travel to get their boy**

Yea!!!

2011-01-09T20:05:00.001-05:00

We got word several days ago, on my husband's birthday, that our Ella is clear for international adoption!!!
And (country) is reopening for submissions the second week in Feb!! Of course that is pending all the crazy votes that are happening. But I have a good feeling, We are slotted to submit our paperwork Feb 10th, yippee!!
So, of course everyone's next question is when do you get her?
1. We submit our paperwork, God willing, Feb 10th
2. Wait for a travel date, it is usual to receive your travel date 2-3 weeks after you submit
3. The travel date is usually 2-3 later
So, best case scenario we would travel in March, have her home in April
To say we are excited is an understatement!

I'm Baaaack

2010-12-24T22:57:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas Everyone!!

I know I disappeared on you for a while, I was here, just really didn't feel like posting. This adoption has been a crazy emotional ride. There have been more than one bill in the parliament that has threatened to close down adoptions in the country we are adopting from. Rumors, highs, lows, just craziness. I really don't know what to tell people when they ask how our adoption is going. Because at any given moment I don't really know. At this point in time it's looking a little more postive, that could change any minute, the life of international adoption. I was definitely shielding myself emotionally.
So, for the past month and a half I've just been enjoying my kiddos, hubby, and getting ready for Christmas.
Once the holidays, are over, I need to either mail or take several documents to Atlanta to apostilled, then mail them to our country facilitators. These are the docs that will be more than 3 months old at the beginning of February when they hope to submit us.
But really, we are doing great here. We got to visit some close friends and family for Thanksgiving and we are enjoying a great laid back Christmas at home with the kids.
I'm going to be be doing some advocating/informational posts on different types of special needs adoption.
If I have this mode of communication I might as well use it! So if your not one of my adoption world friends (man I love those ladies) Then check back next week. Even if you are not interested in adopting, maybe someone you know is, or maybe there are other ways you can help, or just come to learn.

Blessings!

2010-11-16T10:19:00.000-05:00

Our adoption processes have brought a lot of blessings in my life. One of the huge ones being the online community of adoption folks. Through blogs and forums I have met some of the best people. One of them being my online friend Laurie. She volunteered to help us sell t-shirts. Through that one of her family members, Christine, was lead to our blog. Christine feels lead to help us with raising money for our adoption. How wonderful is that? That someone I don't even know will take the leap of faith to help us out, not only with our adoption, but with spreading the word about special needs adoption. She has become a consultant with the company 31, she will be donating all the proceeds she makes this month to Ella's adoption!
I ordered a skirt purse from there several years ago, and I got so many compliments on it. Let me tell you their stuff has gotten even cuter. If you are not familiar with 31, go check it out. It is a great place to get a gift for that hard to shop for person. I got my Grandma a travel bag from there, monogrammed with her name, several years ago. She still raves on about it!
So go to Christine's website and check it out!
http://www.mythirtyone.com/cwickline/
If you want to place an order make sure you email her and let her know it is for Ella cwickline1@sbcglobal.net

Blessings and Oops

2010-11-16T10:00:00.000-05:00

You didn't think I was really going to be back to post today did you!
First of all my oops. I failed to notice that on the preview they sent of our shirts that our blog address is wrong on all of the grey shirts and all of the black shirts. Yep, I put together 17 packages of shirts to mail out without noticing. Attention to detail-NOT ME! Everyone loves the shirts, anyways! I have gotten nothing but rave reviews on them, they are super cute and very soft and comfy!! If you're interested in doing a fundraiser, you can have them done in almost any country even the United States!! For all those brave folks who do foster adoption or infant adoption!! Go to http://www.mycrazyadoption.com/ She sells the rights to use the design, 50.00 is really minimal for the great profit margin you get on the shirts, and she does great things, go support her! The printing company that sells the shirts at cost for these designs is http://www.creatordesigns.com/, if you purchase the 50.00 fundraiser kit from Kari then she will give you the contact information to contact the printing company. They will make a preview of what your shirt will look like. Make sure you read all the previews to make sure your design is correct::-)
We still have shirts available, I ordered extras. I will do my best to post the actual pictures of the shirts and what sizes we have available tonight!!

Blessing, Signs, and Oops

2010-11-15T11:00:00.000-05:00

Adoption brings about huge God moments. I'm not joking, or trying to speak Christianese to you. God has sent me the most AWEsome signs while going through adoption, and anyone who has gone through this process knows that is the truth. I have felt so discouraged since finding out we have to wait till Feb to submit for Ella, and now there is an impending vote that has passed a preliminary vote and will be voted on again anytime as soon as this week through spring. It would stop adoptions from the country we are adopting from. Not permanently, but for months.
Since we won't submit till Feb, we have to redo most of our paperwork, nothing can be more than 6 months old.
I know that God's timing is perfect, but I have to remind myself of that everyday, sometimes every minute. I am not usually this down about things, I am usually a cup half full kind of person.
I prayed last week in church, not that I haven't prayed about the situation everyday, but prayer just seems so much more powerful when your standing in church. "Please Lord, I need a sign we are supposed to be doing this, some encouragement would be great. Not sure what kind of sign you could send, you have sent so many, but my heart feels desperate"
We were hopeful to recieve some new pictures of Ella, there was a family adopting from her orphanage, however upon arriving in the country, the girl they were supposed to adopt was not available. Things worked out for them and the child, but it was very hard on them at first. And that voided the possibility of anyone checking on Ella for us during this wait.
Last week Anastasia told me she had a dream about Ella. Usually Anastasia has bad dreams (sad I know) She said we had gotten Ella and she was sooo cute and we loved her sooo much. She said at the end of her dream her, Ella, and Jesus were in an elevator. I asked if she talked to Jesus. She said no, because in her dreams she can't control what happens. But she took a couple more bites of her cereal and turned to me over her shoulder and said, "I think Jesus was there to help Ella"
Enough said, right?
This post is long enough I will post about the rest tomorrow!

Moving on Up

2010-10-28T10:23:00.000-04:00

Our Thermometer that is...
So far we have made 350.00 with T-shirt sales, but I ordered extras and intend to make more than that.
We had some generous people donate in addition to buying T-shirts, or donating instead of buying T-shirts, adding 160.00!
AND we were able to save 500.00 out of our paychecks this month.

All that narrows the gap by .... $1010.00!!

Making the amount we still need

8,679.00

I'd like to add that the 350.00 in T-shirts sales, reflects the fact that I already paid the bill to the T-shirt company. My goal on the T-shirt sales is 1,000.00 So we only need to sell 26 more shirts to make that happen. Because from here on out the T-shirts are all profit, since I paid the bill out of our sales.

Disappointing News....challenging myself

2010-10-19T11:27:00.000-04:00

Ugh, our dossier should be arriving today in country. However last night we recieved some dissappointing news. When we committed to Ella it was though that she was already cleared for adoption. Then we were told that it was not until sometime in October. Well, now they (the SDA in her country) is saying not until Jan. Her country closes down for submittals sometime in November until sometime in February.
We are heartbroken. We are ready for her to be home, why should she sit in an orphanage parentless, when we are ready. That's 4+ months of her legs getting tighter and tighter, her not getting the proper nutrition, her not learning to bond with other people, her not having therapy. We are heartbroken, but we know everything will work out how it is supposed to. Thankfully we were extended at our base until summer, we were supposed to have to move in the spring.
I was just telling some AWESOME friends last night, that we were ready to take on the debt of another adoption. We would just pay it off once she was home, like we are doing with Anastasia. Well, we are 9,000 something short so far, and I am challenging myself to not have to go into debt for this, we have been given more time, wether we like it or not, and I intend to use it wisely.
Adoption is not easy. When Anastasia came out of her room this morning, I felt so thankful. So thankful, that what seemed like impossible, was possible, to bring her into our family.
I've added an expense thermometer. The money on it so far represents, the 8,000 we have saved ourselves so far, the money committed to us by some close friends, donations, etc... And as donations come in and as we are able to save money from our paychecks I will add to that thermometer. I love a challenge!!

This Is For Real..please do something

2010-10-15T06:34:00.000-04:00

There are orphans in need, around 147 million, way too many. You don't need to adopt to make a difference. To make a huge difference, I mean, isn't saving 1 child's life a huge difference? When people say they admire me, there is one thing that goes through my head, and that is "don't". When we adopted our Anastasia (www.1moremakes5.blogspot.com) we were not out to adopt a special needs child, or to even save a child, or even to adopt internationally. Step, by shaky step God lead us that way. And I can tell you, these orphanages do not have the resources over there, it is scary to say the least. It is not right for a 5 year old to weigh 17 lbs. And this is not a rare occurrence. Time after time you can read about real families, families I know online, that within weeks of meeting their 2-3 year old child, the child has learned to sit up, make eye contact, reach for a toy, roll over, etc... This is not an exaggeration. I myself used to think it was, even after Anastasia's adoption I was ignorant.
This week, the RR community got a huge reminder of how real this is, one of their "healthy" waiting children passed away. Several families have seen her recently while picking up their own children from the same orphanage. Ann Marie, was about to get sent to the institution. 4 is the age in Ella's country where these babies are sent to an institution for a life of little hope. Ann Marie was a household name for all RR families. We all knew who she was and many families advocated for her and loved her.
It is not know why she passed away, she is not the first Reeces Rainbow child to pass away while being on the waiting child listing, and unfortunately she will not be the last.
I want to share a poem that Meredith Cornish wrote : www.cornishadoptionjourney.blogspot.com

While we were...

While we were eating…
… they were hungry
While we were playing…
… they were restrained
While we were tucking our kids into bed…
… they were alone
While we turned up the heat…
… they laid in the icy cold
While we wrapped our children in blanket sleepers…
… they laid in their own excrement
While we sang songs and listened to music…
… they listened to the screams and cries of those around them
While we rocked our babies…
… they silently rocked themselves
While we hugged our kids…
… they scratched at their own faces and pulled their own hair for stimulation
While we cried over scraped knees…
… they moaned in their loneliness
While we brushed our daughters’ beautiful hair…
… they had their heads shaven to stave off the lice
While we fought off the flu with love and nourishment…
… they got the flu and went Home.
No longer suffering… but so many more still are.
In memory of those that have never felt the love of a family, but have passed away alone.

Sending off the "Beast"

2010-10-14T16:58:00.000-04:00

Haha, this is what RR families call our dossier (our official set of documents that get submitted to the country we are adopting from) Let me tell you the dossier for this country is nothing near as "beastly" as the one for Russia was. I drove to Atlanta this morning to get everything apostilled, then headed to FedEx to ship it off.
Feeling paper pregnant now!
What now?
We wait. Basically.
1. To see if she clear for international adoption yet
2. If she is our dossier will be submitted to the proper people over there
3. If not then we wait some more
4. If we are submitted then we wait to get a travel date, best case scenario would be late November, but it could be as late as February.

Fundraiser Time!!

2010-10-13T11:53:00.000-04:00

I don't like fundraising, I don't like asking for money, most people don't. I love to give, really I do, it's one of my favorite things, ask my husband, even if we weren't adopting again we wouldn't have any money because I'd be giving it all away. So I will full force fundraise in the next month for our adoption. I feel lead to do this. Fundraising for our adoption not only gives others the opportunity to take part in our journey and to help us (thank you) but it spreads the word for orphans everywhere. I have chosen fundraisers that I believe will not only benefit us, but others. Click on the tabs above to read about our T-shirts and our Upcoming Gold Party.

I have kind of kept my heart guarded during this process, not quite letting myself enjoy the possibilites yet. Adoption is emotionally straining, as is pregnancy don't get me wrong.
We have all of our paperwork ready!! Praise the Lord, and thank you to those who have helped to make it happen. We got our Golden Ticket this past Saturday!! (immigration approval) and we are getting the last documents notarized and approved today. I may be able to get this mailed by the end of the week, if not, then the beginning of next.
Where do we go from there? Only time will tell. I will keep you updated!

Building to bring my baby home

2010-09-30T09:17:00.000-04:00

I have always wanted to learn to build. Someone told me about an awesome website with great knock off furniture plans. I have been wanting this bookrack since I saw it years ago, and I especially wanted the above the bed bookrack for each of my kids. But I was too cheap. So when I saw the plans for this, I got busy!
Gary helped me with the first one. I was scared of the table saw, then an awesome friend lent me her husband's miter saw, and I love it, not scary at all.
So, for our first fundraiser I will be creating a custom made bookrack for a lucky someone.
I have chosen not to do a "raffle" These take a lot of work to make, and the purpose of my hard work is to make money for our adoption. So for the first bookrack, it will be wider version pictures below. I fit at least 130-140 books on the skinny verson so 150-175 books should fit easily on the wider version, as it has a little more book space than the skinny version.
You will get to pick your paint color!! And it will come with hardware to secure it to your wall.
I am asking for a minimum donation of 85.00

The one in this picture was made for a friend who hired me to made the wide version, love it!

I make them so that they fit snug against the wall with no gaps.

This was my first one, it is the tall skinny version. I kept it for my kids.

If you want a matching small bookrack you can add that for 25.00

I made these for myself and a friend hired me to make them for her 4 boys. They go above the bed to store nighttime reading books. I have not hung mine yet, as we are due to move this spring, but I am so excited about them!!

Our Cost Breakdown

2010-09-28T11:58:00.000-04:00

I have not felt lead to post this till now. We will be fundraising in a more proactive way soon.
This is our projected cost breakdown:

What is the cost breakdown?

UP TO $24k for one child

Breakdown: (ROUGH estimates)

$700 homestudy update PAID

8/17 $100 mailing 1^st set of docs PAID

8/28 $830 USCIS,i-600a and fingerprinting PAID

$3000 flights first trip

$3000 flights second trip

$8600 facilitator fees

$1700 first trip lodging ($80/nt 3 weeks)

$1100 second trip lodging ($80/nt 2 weeks)

$450 first trip food/other supplies ($20/day 3 weeks)

$250 second trip food/other supplies ($20/day 2 weeks)

$600 passport

$550 Visa and Medical

$2000 transportation (in country)

$1000 orphanage donation/dossier preparation costs

Still need to pay 22,250

By keeping a tight budget we have been able to pay for our costs so far out of hubby's paychecks. That is something that God has always gifted me with, I can save money when needed. I drive my husband crazy with it too I think. There is no Starbucks, no hair appointments, no pedicures, etc...

We have been blessed with some very generous donations. Our FSP account with Reece's Rainbow has 531.00 in it, wahoo!!

Stay tuned for some upcoming fundraisers. And if your willing to skip a Starbuck, a lunch out, etc... to help bring Ella home, then click on our Ella Button to the right and you can make a tax deductible donation to Reeces Rainbow into our account!!

Posts Galore!

2010-09-28T11:16:00.000-04:00

So, I have not been the best blogger this go around. I really have not explained how this whole thing is going to work.
We are almost done with all paperwork on our end, well, we are done, pending our translator reviewing our documents for mistakes, so see if we have an do-overs!
From there we are only waiting on our 171, that is from INS, it is our official approval to adopt and bring and orphan into the states. They have recently redone the system and are backlogged. They have had our application for 4.5 weeks and we are not even assigned an officer as of this morning. Ugh
The country we are adopting from does closes down for adoptions sometime in November. We NEED that INS approval, we cannot move forward without it. I have contacted a senator's office immigration liason for help, not sure if he'll answer my email, if not, then I will call.
Assuming we get that done in time to submit our dossier to our country by their closing date in November. Then we mail it over there, our facilitator submits it to the SDA office there, then anywhere from 2-4 weeks later we are given a travel date for anywhere from 2-4 weeks later (that's the "norm")
So WHEN, you keep asking, I dunno!!
I am not a patient person, so trust me this is painful. God's timing is always perfect I keep reminding myself.
Once we are over there we go to our SDA appt., recieve our official referral, then travel to where Ella is to meet her. We will have daily visits with her, while waiting for our court date, which "averages" 2.5 weeks after getting there. After court there is a 10 day waiting period, then traveling to the capitol of that country to get more paperwork done, then come home. We plan on coming home directly after court, then probably just myself going back for the second trip.

I promised to post

2010-09-21T21:47:00.001-04:00

when we found out what happened with the bill that was trying to put a stop to all adoptions in the country we are adopting from. It did not pass, actually it was never even voted on. So we can all carry on and breath just a little easier!

A laugh or a cry

2010-09-18T10:51:00.000-04:00

There is nothing exciting going on here. But if you would like a good laugh or a good cry, I direct you to this blog http://www.covenantbuilders.blogspot.com/
They are in EE, they just successfully adopted a beautiful boy who happens to have arthrogryposis. They adopted him despite the fact that he is in an institution. In this country children with special needs are sent to an institution at the age of 4, some orphanagaes are able to hold onto them till 5. The Nalle family have not had a traditional journey due to the fact that Aaron is not only in an institution, but that there has never been an adoption out of this region. The Nalle's had to go through a court session that was grueling, and it ended with the judge saying "If God led you to adopt this child, then God led me to decide in your favor"
Both Julia and Rob are excellent writers. I read their blog and I laugh and cry. I have said that never before have I felt closer to God than during adoption. Getting pregnant can happen on "accident" God has to move mountains for a lot of these children to find homes. His presence can easily be seen, but that does mean that the journey is easy!

Anything New?

2010-09-12T14:27:00.000-04:00

Hmm. well, so is anything new with the adoption? Well, right now we are finishing up our dossier paperwork. That is our official set of documents that is sent to Ella's country. It has things such at medicals, employment verification, verification of the size of our house, power of attorneys, etc, etc, etc.... First off let me say Russia's dossier was about 3x as much paperwork, so I am not complaining! But it is still very specific. We will fax all these documents to be reviewed, then I will drive to Atlanta to be apostilled. That is a certification of a notarized document. There is only one place in each state that does this, it is very official. Thankfully our state charges 3.00 per seal, rather than the 10.00 some states charge. Once we are done with that we can do nothing else until we get our I600A approval. That is the United States government approving us to adopt and bring an orphan into this country. This will be the only thing we are waiting on, that and Ella clearing for international adoption, sometime in October. So best case scenario would be her clearing at the end of October and us getting our I600A approval by then. Then the paperwork is submitted, and typically you receive a travel date about a month or so out from there. So the earliest we could be traveling looks like the end of November.
That being said, we also got word of a "vote" that is being done in the next couple weeks in her country that could stop adoptions. Many people who know this country well, say that it is not likely this bill will get voted through. But still we are not breathing easy until that day comes and goes. We will let you know when it does!!

2010-09-06T20:12:00.000-04:00

I've got a new picture!

2010-09-05T19:15:00.000-04:00

Well it was actually taken June 1st. Another family was at her orphanage adopting and there was a function where the children performed. (this is common in EE orphanages) The family had remebered they saw her but forgotten they took a picture. It's more face on, but she is still looking down. Man is she cute! And the curls, oh, the curls!! I can hardly stand the wait. The person holding her in the picture does not appear to be a caretaker, maybe a grandmother? June 1st is her birthday, very happy that she she has someone who cares enough to visit on her birthday, praying that person is selfless enough to sign the papers so she can be adopted.

I didn't know you were planning on adopting again

2010-08-20T21:23:00.002-04:00

That's what most people said to us when we shared our news. And well...we didn't really know either. It just kind of evolved. We had talked about if we would ever adopt again, and we never ruled it out, but we never thought it would be this soon either. I was obsessesed, I would check Reeces Rainbow almost daily while Gary was deployed. I loved to pray for the children and see who got families. I would read the blogs of those adopting RR children and slowwly I started envisioning myself in their shoes. Occasionaly I would send Gary a picture of a little girl that I thought "maybe" we "might" be somewhat interested in adopting. I even emailed RR about 2 of them. For no reason what so ever that's as far as it went.
When Gary got back from his deployment, the nudge to add to our family got stronger. The really odd thing is he was the one to bring it up. He even said he really wanted to add a younger child to the family. Our children are 6.5, 8.5. and 9.5
I had seen Ella's picture on RR and had offhandedly showed it to Gary once. But we really thought what would be ideal would be a 4-5 year old. Right before our family trip to Ohio RR posted a new picture of Ella, she had just turned 2. I showed the picture to Gary, and immediatley his face lit up. Over the next several weeks Andrea with RR tried to get us more information, like does she walk, does she talk, at that point all they knew was that she had CP. Gary and I would talk about it a little, then avoid the subject. He was under the impression that it would cost as much as our Russian adoption. I told him, that it was ONLY half, and that I had crunched the numbers and we could do it, by doing the same thing we did with Anastasia, take on the debt and pay it off as we could.
So finally, one day I asked him. We need to decided if we are intersted in adopting her, so we can stop torturing ourselves. He said, "i think we both already know the answer" YEAH!!!!

ONE of the huge God things in this: I could never understand why noone had committed to her yet, she was young and cute, and her disabilites seemed mild, she is sitting straight up and using both hands. Several people have told me that they inquired about her with RR, but for some reason they just knew it was not their daughter. One of these women is adopting the one of the 2 little girls we had inquired about.

ANOTHER huge God thing is: we thought we needed more information, it seems crazy to just committ to a child off of 2 pictures and 1 sentence. Over those weeks, everytime I looked at her picture, something happened that only an adoptive mother can explain. In that picture I saw my chosen chld. Not the child we chose but the child God chose for our family. I told Gary, "I know she is ours, when I look at her picture I can feel her in arms" Several days after we committed to her, I got an email from Andrea saying she had gotten more information. The information basically said: she follows directions, talks, seems normal cognitively, can walk holding onto someone's hands.
The funny thing is, it was nice to have that information, but God didn't make it available to us until we let Him lead us blind, to commit to a child that He lead us too. It was like him saying, "see my good and faithful servant, I could have given you this information, but why?"

To say we feel blessed to be adopting again is such an understatement.

Well..hello there!

2010-08-17T21:23:00.003-04:00

Man, technology just moves way too fast. I was so lost trying to get this thing set up. So an awesome blog friend helped me out big time. Are you even allowed to call yourself a blogger if you don't know how to set up your own blog!
Well, first things first. I'll do a little intro of our future daughter today, then tomorrow I'll tell you more about how we got here!

We have decided to name our daughter Ella Nicole. The grandmother my son Cooper is named after is "Eleanor Cooper" When I was pregnant with Cooper they told me at my ultarsound that he was a girl, so that is what we named him. They told us several ultrasounds later that he was in fact a boy. So instead of naming him Ella after Eleanor, we used Cooper.
We've been running over names for 3 weeks, with nothing sticking. Then all of a sudden it hit me. Why are we trying to figure out a name that sounds good, when we have a name that means something. I have a sister that I was not raised with, her name is Sara Nicole, Gary's middle names Nicholas, and one of my very best friend's name is Nicole.
Ella turned 2 in June. She was about 2 pounds at birth. They think she has CP, though it appears that it is mild. Her caregivers say she talks and follows directions and seems to be on target in that perspective. They say she can walk if someone is holding her hand. In her picture she is sitting straight up and using both hands, those are really good things. Is it the same type of CP as Anastasia? We do not know, and may not know till we meet her. The fact that she will have intervention so early in life is great!
We cannot tell you in what country she is, although we can say she is in Eastern Europe.
Here are the 2 pictures we have of her.
The one where she has a bonnet on her head, she was somewhere between 12-18 months. The 2nd picture was taken just 2 months ago right when she turned 2. Isn't she just precious!

I'm trying to get this blog set up

2010-08-12T21:59:00.001-04:00

Sorry, I'm trying! It wasn't this hard last time.